Changes

Right after I posted last night, a friend from undergrad (a third year student) called me. I hadn't heard from him since we'd exchanged a few text messages around Thanksgiving.

He dropped out of the degree program. Last week. He said he'd realized it was no longer for him.

Wow.

He was one of the ones who I thought would actually make it through the music education program. I didn't actually see him staying directly in the field for his entire career (i.e. public school teaching), but he'd been so successful when many of his classmates had not.

In my experience at UGSchool as well as what I see here at GradSchool, it's normal for music ed classes to lose many students as the program continues. The class with whom I graduated began with 35+ kids, and about 18 of us graduated together. We were the largest graduating class in a number of years. My friend's former class began with the same amount and I believe they have under a dozen who will be graduating together.

Why does this happen? The program is tough. It's designed to weed out those people who want the ed degree as a backup if their performance career doesn't work out. The program is also challenging enough that people who don't have the necessary skills to teach music don't make it through. The piano exams tend to eliminate many this way. So many hoops to jump through, and if you don't jump high enough, you don't make it.

I was shocked when my friend said that he simply realized he didn't want to do this anymore and that he'd felt that way for a long time. Apparently he'd been too scared to do anything about it. I'm afraid that he burned out because he'd been so involved with a number of outside but related activities this semester (internships, assistantships), but I didn't tell him that. Instead, I told him that he was brave for making such a big change and that I supported him because I'm sure it had been difficult. He's not quite sure what he'll do next, but he's been unable to sleep at night because he's been excitedly considering all the possibilities out there for him.

To make a life change like that is tough. I can't even imagine it. Starting something as huge as a degree program and deciding more than halfway through it that I could no longer commit to it. One of my other friends from undergrad did that. After his first year at UGSchool, he transferred to a prestigious music program elsewhere. He loves it. I was really jealous at first because I was dissatisfied with the same things in our program as he was. It never occurred to me to actually consider leaving. As things turned out, I believe I was still more successful at UGSchool than I would have been elsewhere because I learned so much from opportunities exclusively available at UGSchool. At GradSchool, I'm now learning things that my friend is learning in his undergraduate program at prestigious school, but I have a better foundation in many other areas than he has, thanks to UGSchool program. He's specializing in the field without all of the background material, and I've gotten both. We're both happy with what we're learning and I believe we'll both be successful ... even if his school name likely carries more weight in our field.

Enough random thoughts. Must go prepare for finals.