Stream of Consciousness

My younger brother just graduated from high school yesterday. Starting this fall, my parents will enjoy an empty nest for the first time in 22 years. We children have been their focus for the full extent of our lives, and I'm curious to see what kinds of "lifestyle changes" my parents implement once they have more time and space.

I made dinner this evening for the family. I haven't really cooked a full meal on my own before ... and I need to know how to do so if I'm going to be living on my own next year (no more dorms, no more RA-ing, no more campus food meal plan ... thank goodness!). Pesto-stuffed tomatoes, Broccoli-Chicken Puffs, and Raspberry-Walnut Salad with poppy seed dressing. Yum!

Tomorrow: lunch date with Dad, errands, dinner out with high school friends I haven't seen in 2 years. Oh, and I'm going to force myself to get up at a ridiculous hour (before 6am) to start my summer walking regime.

Last summer, my closest friend from home and I got up and walked together at sunrise. Sometimes we strolled, other times we walked at a brisk pace. Unfortunately, she's living elsewhere this summer and my sister refuses to get up that early ... so I haven't been motivated enough on my own to get up and go. This evening at dinner, I mentioned that I might try to start tomorrow ... and by saying it aloud, I vowed to myself that I was actually committing to doing it! I'm hoping that it energizes me for the rest of the day since I'll have to be super-productive tomorrow.

And now? I ought to do my devotional and get SOME sleep since my alarm is set to rudely wake me up in less than 7 hours!

Love is in the air ... or the water?

Before this year, I'd been to only two weddings of friends of mine (in my age group). Now it seems like more and more of my friends are getting engaged or married.

I'll be in BestFriend's wedding in less than 2 weeks. Two weeks after that, I'm going to another wedding. Today, I was asked to be an Honorary Bridesmaid for the wedding of my closest friend from home. (She had to move up her wedding date because of her new job, and now I won't be able to go because I'm still gonna be at the international conference then. I can't change my plans, and I am very upset that I can't be there in person for her.) In the past week, I've found out a former classmate who just got married and another friend who just got engaged.

I'm so excited and happy for all of these people. It's so wonderful that they've found the person with whom they want to spend the rest of their life. I guess ... it's taken me by surprise, the suddenness of all of this. While I recognize that we've slowly been growing and maturing over the years, my memories of these people (from years and years ago) don't seem all that distant.

The classmate who just got married? I remember him doodling on my papers 10 years ago. The friend who just got engaged? I still recall her as a shy high school freshman who had just moved to my area.

Perhaps part of the reason all this seems so baffling to me is because I'm just not at that stage yet. I've learned more (vicariously) through BestFriend's developing relationship than through my own limited dating experience. And I'm happy. In the meantime (that is, until I reach that point myself someday), I'll enjoy celebrating with friends as they make their everlasting commitments of love and faithfulness. :-)

Experimenting

There is so much I don't know how to do. I'm somewhat relieved that I'm taking baby steps towards adulthood. Well, maybe "baby steps" isn't an appropriate way to describe graduate studies ... but ... I am grateful that I'm not jumping both feet first into the real world. I still have a great deal to learn about personal finances, car maintenance, living on my own ... but at least I won't have to be a first year teacher as I learn about many of these things!

I don't really know how to cook. While I've watched my mom for years, I haven't actually made much (e.g. not much more than spaghetti) on my own. My grandfather used to say, "If you can read, you can cook." I'm hoping he's right.

In an effort to educate myself this summer, I vowed to try out recipes on my family. (I received a great cookbook for graduation, and I wrote in my thank you note that I'd be practicing this summer!) So ... I went through many, many recipes today and selected an appetizer, a main course, and a side dish for next Thursday. I hope that I'll have good news to report on this end next week. :-)

I was given free flowers today!

My mom and I went to a flower stand today to purchase flowers for our garden. My mother struck up a chat with the older man who was selling flowers. As she visits the same place many times a year, they've formed an acquaintance. (His grandchildren are friends with my brother too.) He asked about our family, and Mom proudly announced that I had just graduated from college. (I get slightly embarrassed when she brags to acquaintances and sometimes to strangers, "Summa!" But ... I do understand she's my mother and she's proud of me.) :-)

He told me, "Go ahead and pick out a hanging flower basket, for your graduation."

I thanked him very sweetly as I chose a pretty basket of light pink flowers. What a kind gesture!

When we got home, Mom and I worked quickly together, and it only took us about an hour to plant the flowers we'd just bought.

Home Life

I spent over an hour yesterday with my younger brother (who will graduate from high school in a week!) on a piece of music. He'd been asked by the adult choir director at church to compose a cello line to accompany one of the choir's anthems. My brother then came to me for help. The anthem is a lovely arrangement of a powerful spiritual, "Give Me Jesus." I enjoyed working with my brother on this ... bonding over our shared love for music. He too will be studying music in college, though he has chosen a different field than mine. I can't believe he's really going to be graduating from high school in a week.

In the evening, my parents (avid AI fans) had invited over another family, friends of ours, to watch the final showdown. I don't watch the show while at school ... and frankly, it hasn't been the same since my favorite season, AI2 (because I developed a huge crush on the runner-up) ... but I've been catching up on this season in the few weeks I've been home. Family meals and evening TV time seem to be the times when we're all together. I hardly ever watch TV while at school, but I seem to get sucked into time-wasting activities (like TV) more when I'm home. Then I wonder why I never get anything done. (As I'm writing this, I'm shaking my head and laughing at myself ... still in my pajamas because I inadvertently slept 2 hours past my alarm this morning. I am trying to get into a regular schedule ... but ... I also admit that I'm not trying very hard. I am appreciating this luxury though.)

I spent some time yesterday with my younger sister (the middle child). We like to watch chick flicks and Disney movies together. Last night, she really wanted to watch Snow White ... and we brushed each other's hair during the movie. After we'd traded the hairbrushing favors, we both settled back to watch the last 30 minutes of the movie ... and both of us dozed off. Quality time. :-)

Wrapping up some more loose ends

My car is now over 1000 miles older after my brief road trip last week. I drove to CoolCity on Wednesday to attend concerts at both of the schools where I had student taught last fall. To my surprise and delight, the elementary orchestra kids remembered me! It was a pleasure to return to that school and hear how far they have come since October. I loved seeing the high school choir kids too. They performed some of my all-time favorite choral pieces: If Music Be the Food of Love by Dickau and The Awakening by Joseph Martin(?). Lovely to hear them, and I enjoyed chatting with them after the concert!

Two days later, I drove to Rural School for my first private lesson, the beginning of my graduate studies! I'm very grateful for the independent study this summer because my skills are so far behind in this area, and I expect that I will learn much more from the one-on-one learning environment. Yay! After getting to know the area better and attending yet another concert, I drove back to CoolCity in time to sing at church on Sunday. (No CGFC, but ... my "private detective" told me she was breaking confidence by sharing that CGFC had told her husband he had been very interested in me, but he was simply too busy. I'm taking this with a grain of salt because few people are so busy that they cannot return a phone call ... but ... it was nice to hear anyway.)

After church, I drove back home. On the way, I met up with a friend/mentor. She's approaching a new decade in her life, and she was reflecting on all that she's been able to accomplish in this past decade.

"This past decade [20's] has been very much about me and what I've wanted to do. You know," she said, "God does great things with single people." (That line really stuck with me, because I've been feeling more and more lately that I have so much adventuring to do before I'll be ready to settle down in one place!)

She continued, "I don't think I would have been able to do all that I have done if I hadn't been single." She reflected more on what she has done and how approaching this next chapter in her life (talking of marriage plans) has already begun to shape her outlook on what the new decade will bring.
~*~*~*~

Last night, I led a youth choir rehearsal because the director, my friend, was out of town. I loved it! I haven't worked with a choir since student teaching last fall ... and I hadn't realized just how much I've missed it.

On the agenda for this week: errands, cleaning, unpacking, practicing, and preparing for the next (slightly more intense) road trip in less than 2 weeks!

Randomness from the past week

Oops. Didn't mean to neglect this for a week. I suppose I haven't had much to say. Highlights from the past week include:

*I discovered I love spinach salad ... with dried cranberries, almonds, and a raspberry/pomegranate dressing ... yum!

*I've been mistaken for a high school student a few times within the past week, including at my old high school when I went to my brother's awards ceremony (I'm sure I'll appreciate looking young in a few years ... but ... not as fun now)

*Because of the former ^, my hair is now going through an awkward growing stage, in hopes that a new haircut will make me look older (or, at the very least, my own age!)

*Still don't need glasses! Hurray! Doctor said I may not ever need them

*Mom loved the dinner my siblings (and dad) and I cooked for her on Mother's Day

*I saw a former high school classmate with his wife and baby at church on Sunday

*I held a 10-week old baby this afternoon!!! (different baby)

*Got 3 audiobooks at the library to keep me occupied while I drive (alone) between 16 and 20 hours in the next 5 days

*So ... yes, lots of traveling ... probably no more entries for another few days ...

*Getting up in probably less than 6 hours ... should go to sleep!

Goodbye to MySchool & CGFC, Hello to Summer

After the reception on Saturday, my mom came back to my room to help me pack all my stuff while the rest of my family meandered around CoolCity. (What a mom!) Even though I had brought a carload of my belongings home when I returned home for the previous week's interview, I still had a crazy amount of stuff in the room. In fact, all my stuff FILLED the family van and my sweet little car.

Saturday night, my family joined the families of 5 of my friends (the clique of which I was formerly a part) for dinner. I was surprised that they'd invited me ... and I had hesitated about going ... but then ... I realized, "Why not? This could be the last time we're all together like this." So I decided to go, just for old times' sake. And, just as I have been excluded from the clique's activities this year ... my family was the only family at our particular table while the other 5 families shared the other two tables. There was still some interaction ... but ... I suppose I preferred that it worked out this way, so that I could still enjoy a special dinner with my family while also occasionally chatting with the other girls (without having to try hard to make small talk with their families whom I don't know). Yeah ... so ... weird, but OK. It was nice to see them, and it wasn't difficult saying goodbye because I'd already said goodbye to them emotionally last fall. (Ouch ~ that sounds pretty awful. I suppose I mean- we've grown apart, and I've healed since then.)

Sunday ~ church in the morning. CGFC was there. I was playing through the hymns for our choir (since the organist hadn't come in to rehearse with us yet), and CGFC walked in to ask if we wanted to run over the service music with the organist. I was shocked to see him because I had thought that his final service at the church had been two weeks ago.

Later, we crossed paths before the service. We exchanged greetings.

He asked, "How are you? Are you done with classes?"

"I graduated yesterday," I announced to him proudly. And I said something about my assistantship for next year.

"How about you? Are you done?" He said he was pretty much done. Of course, he never said anything about never having called like he'd said he would. And that was that. No more conversation with CGFC. I certainly don't think he'll be there when I return in 2 weeks. But oh! A part of me really wishes he'd realize what he missed out on (me!!!) and be even the slightest bit regretful! :-) As I walked back to MySchool's campus from church (quite possibly the last time ever), I erased his number from my cell phone. Don't need it.

That afternoon, my family and I finished packing and loaded the two cars. Then we drove the several hours home.

Yesterday, I slept in and stayed in my pajamas for the entire day. Today, I slept in even later but stayed in pajamas only until mid-afternoon. :-) I unloaded the cars ... but unpacking will take much longer. Need to unpack. Need to gather things for a yard sale. Need to reclaim my bedroom at home from all the boxes and bags and everything else. And now? Need to go to sleep so that I can be bright and perky for an appointment in the morning!

(This week, I'm in recovery mode. Next week, I hope to start working my flexible summer job before I return to CoolCity for a brief spell!)

Festivities: Thursday through Saturday morning

Thursday was the start of graduation festivities. I attended a luncheon for graduates after I played for a friend's elementary school concert in the morning. Following the free food, I walked to another part of CoolCity with BestFriend and her roommates to explore the used bookstore and used CD/DVD store. (I got some great but cheap world music CDs, because I'm going to make world music the theme of the weeklong music camp I'm teaching for elementary school children next month.) From there, I booked it back to campus to rehearse for the next day's Baccalaureate service. Then I had an hour break before I had to head out to play for another concert at my friend's elementary school.

After the evening concert, I called my aunt and uncle, who had come into town for my graduation. I picked them up at their hotel and we drove to another part of CoolCity (where BestFriend and I had gone the week before). We ate lunch at a fun, trendy Chinese restaurant to which I had not been for 2-3 years. Yummy. Then ... back to campus. When I returned to campus, I went to a friend's room. This particular friend had collected pictures over the past 4 years and had compiled them into a movie for our small group of friends (the clique to which I used to belong, but not so much anymore). It was lovely to see the pictures, to laugh, to cry, etc. Before the final segment of the movie began, she apologized for its incompletion. Then the subtitle "Graduation 2007" flashed across the screen ... and we laughed. :-)

After I dutifully checked in for RA curfew (11pm curfew during finals, yuck!), I went up to an RA friend's room and hung out with her for awhile. We decided to get lunch the next morning one last time because she was leaving for Paris on Friday. (She's an international student, and she is completing an internship in Paris for a month before returning home to her country.)
~*~*~*~

Friday: Day 1 of Graduation (University-wide)
After breakfasting with my friend, I went back to sleep for an hour. Then I got ready and attended an end-of-the-year luncheon for RAs. Italian-themed. (Ahh, memories!) It lasted way too long, but the free food was great. From there, I had under an hour to get ready for the Baccalaureate service. Lovely service.

Then it was time to line up with all of the other graduates from the University to process into the big building for the graduation ceremony. There were many people missing, including most of my music school friends, because this "official" graduation was not as important as our unofficial music school graduation the next day. We chatted and took pictures under the big tent outside (where we were lining up) before we processed in. BestFriend and I noticed that our families were sitting right next to each other, but they didn't even know one another! How fun! I sat between BestFriend and another good friend (who had been my first closest friend at the school). The ceremony wasn't too long (just under 2 hours), but I found it difficult to pay attention. This was the big formal ceremony where our degrees were officially conferred, but ... it wasn't the meaningful ceremony. I didn't flip my tassel right away because I was expecting them to tell us to do that at some point after our degrees were conferred. (They didn't.) Oops. :-)

After the ceremony, my family took many pictures of me outside the music school. Then we headed out for a fancy-schmancy dinner at a ritzy place overlooking much of the city. (Gorgeous, gorgeous view!) At the restaurant, my aunt and uncle presented me with graduation gifts. I'm currently wearing a T-shirt they gave me which reads, "DANGER: Educated Woman Inside." Great, huh? :-)

After I dropped my family off at the hotel, I returned to campus. I checked in with my boss to ask him a question, and he told me that I didn't have to check in later for tha RA curfew. (Sweet!!!) So I spent 20 minutes deciding what to wear before I headed over to a party at a friend's house. After 20 minutes of being there, I decided to get ready to leave because I didn't really know many people. I thought it was going to be a party for the music kids, but there weren't many there. Just as I was gathering my belongings, a friend of mine arrived. I ended up staying over another hour, chatting with this friend. (He's going to be performing in Nashville this summer and possibly longer ... so ... a roadtrip might be in the works! I talked with another classmate on Saturday, and he was up for a roadtrip ... so we'll see!) Then BestFriend and her fiance arrived, so I hung out with them too before I went back to campus.
~*~*~*~

On Saturday, I got up early to get ready for the music school ceremony. It was at this ceremony that my friends and I would walk across the stage to receive our diplomas. Our call time was 45 minutes before the ceremony was to begin, and we spent that time taking pictures and reminiscing. BestFriend presented me with a graduation gift, which is probably the gift I will treasure most: She had gone around to my friends, residents, and professors reciting this speech, "Hi, I'm Estrella's close friend, and I'm compiling a memory book for her. Will you please take a moment to write something for her in here?" She had included pictures and pages from many, many people who have meant so much to me during my time at MySchool. Wow. Very, very special.

[Insert long pause in writing process here as I helped my mom unload and unpack groceries from the store.]

After the music ed kids took our first and last class picture together, it was time.

*Cue Pomp and Curcumstance*

We processed into the Union Ballroom and took our seats at the front. When our names were called, we were to walk onto the stage. Before receiving the diploma [diploma case, because we didn't actually receive our diplomas; those will be mailed to us], each person was directed to stand at the front of the stage while his/her faculty adviser read a brief biography of the graduate. Then the graduate would shake the Dean's hand before receiving the diploma.

When it was our row's turn to line up at the foot of the stage, I got the worst butterflies in my stomach. I was SO nervous. For what reason? I have no idea! It felt like major stage fright. I wasn't afraid really ~ I had no fears about messing up or falling off the stage or anything like that. I didn't know why my nerves were so intense!

Then my name was called, and I walked on the stage in front of my peers and our families. My department chair read the biography I had submitted. He had eliminated certain things without telling me, and I was disappointed that he didn't mention FamousConductor under whose direction I sang for 3 years (not associated with MySchool) and he didn't say the name of the Director of Program at Rural School, and the person is the reason I'm going there. But ... department chair did present me with the certificate for the award I earned from the state association for one of my accomplishments. (The award had first been announced at the Senior Music Ed dinner two weeks ago, but it wasn't listed in the ceremony's program as other awards were.) I proudly shook the Dean's hand, accepted the diploma case and the framed certificate, and walked offstage. I was distracted by my uncle taking a picture of me, and didn't notice what happened next. (Others told me later.) Apparently, the audience spontaneously began clapping for me, even though the Dean had directed them to hold all applause for the graduates until the end. The Dean had to motion them to stop so that he could announce the next graduate. I can't believe I didn't notice this at all! How cool! :-) (My family said they hadn't started the applause, so I wonder who did!)

Through this ceremony, I learned so much about my fellow classmates as their biographies were read. Some of them were very amusing while others were extremely impressive. :-) After I had walked across the stage, I turned my class ring around because it's supposed to face in while you're a student and face out after you graduate. (Nearer to your heart as you continue your studies at MySchool, to remind you of where you belong, and facing out after you've graduated so that others know where you've been.)

After the ceremony, there was a reception in the music school in our honor. I hugged friends and professors, took pictures, and said goodbyes. I'm grateful that two friends are getting married this summer, so I didn't have to say real goodbyes without knowing when I'll see people again.

There is more to write ... but this entry is getting rather long as is ... so I'll write more later. :-)

Sol La Do La Do Mi Re Re Do*

I'm sitting in one of the music technology labs at MySchool, copying some of my files onto a disk at the last minute .... wondering when I'll be here again. The world is swirling around me ~ so much to take in ... I'm officially a college graduate now. I turned my ring around (facing outwards, so that everyone I meet can see it) ...

I hope to write more within the next week (and return some very sweet comments), once I get settled at home. (Movin' out tomorrow!)

*sigh* Somehow I'm here .... and four years are officially over. Can't process it all now.


*Solfege is of my alma mater song (text would be too identifiable) ;-)

Done!

I took my last final today.

It took me about twenty minutes to complete all 30 questions and 7 extra credit questions. Ahh ... such joy: taking the only available section (non-Honors to boot!) of an intro-level required-for-graduation core class.

Tomorrow I'm playing for a friend's two concerts, one in the morning and one at night (which I said I'd do before I realized the extent of the time commitment). I can't really whine about it because it's my own mistake ... I didn't realize it would suck so much time out of the day. :-( Still ... there are plans for a special Senior luncheon, a trip to explore part of MyCity one last time, and hopefully a movie viewing in the late, late evening.)

Friday is a big fancy schmancy celebration (the "official" one with the speeches by important people) ... and Saturday is the more personal celebration of individual accomplishments in my field. :-) Saturday is much more meaningful to me, of course. That afternoon will be spent cramming the huge amount of stuff in my room into portable boxes. After church on Sunday, my family and I drive home. So ... if I don't post in the next few days ... that's why!