"When a guy seems perfect ...

... he's either taken, gay, or both." "Why are all the good ones taken?" "When will it be my chance?"

I've heard these phrases over and over from my beautiful, talented, and intelligent friends. These young women are incredible people, and yet they feel as though guys ignore them. It infuriates them when they see an excellent guy get treated poorly by his girlfriend. It frustrates them when they hear of yet another friend getting engaged or married while they still haven't had a date within the past year!

The apparent lack of attention from the male gender causes these amazing women to doubt themselves. They think that perhaps they're not as beautiful as their other friends and I tell them. They question their worth as people. They worry that their time will run out and that they'll be alone forever.

Years ago, I shared my own lamentations with my mother who told me, "Your time will come."

"When?" I'd asked, half-hoping that she'd tell me the magical age when guys matured and realized what fools they'd been when they had failed to recognize me before.

"Someday. It will come. You'll see," she reassured me.

It wasn't until the end of my senior year of high school that I actually got asked out on a date. I didn't have my first boyfriend or first kiss until halfway through my freshman year of college. I didn't fall in love until 2 1/2 years after that (with boyfriend #2). I've been single since October.

For the most part, I'm OK with this. It doesn't bother me to hear BestFriend gush all about the latest news regarding her upcoming wedding. I don't mind sharing vicariously in others' happiness when they're in a great relationship. I am trying to trust that God knows what He's doing; He just wants me to live and learn some more before He introduces me to the guy He's intended for me. While I hope His time frame lines up with mine (i.e. married by age XX, kids by age XX), I hope He'll give me strength (and patience!) to wait if His time frame is later.

It DOES bother me when I hear a friend question her self-worth (and what she has to offer) because the guys around her are too dense to recognize the stunning woman directly in front of them. I hurt for these girls. They ARE deserving of happiness and I can see no good reason why they don't have what they so earnestly desire. I wish I could hug these friends, reiterate again how much they mean to me and those who know them, and tell them, "Your time will come. Someday. It will come. You'll see."