Luxury

Last week was a long week at work. Long hours every day. Exhaustion and frustration. This next week will be equally challenging, if not more so ... as some of the days will be even longer.

On Thursday, Westley told me he had a surprise planned ... a date for us on Saturday. We're mostly homebodies ... we don't eat out often (because he's a fabulous cook!), and we don't go out to fancy shows or events. We're saving to buy a house .... and we're also just naturally frugal, I suppose.

On Friday morning, I looked in the paper and saw that there was going to be a choral concert in the community, featuring a style of music we both enjoy. I expected that this was the surprise ... and while I would be happy to go, I was disappointed that I had inadvertently ruined the surprise.

Somewhere around hour 10 of the 13 hours I was at work on Friday, I called Westley to check in with him, hear about his day, etc. He asked if I was still excited for my surprise. I said yes, but that I also had a guess as to what it was. He nudged me until I shared my suspicion, and then he gleefully told me that my guess was not the date he'd planned. It was still a surprise. :)

On Saturday morning, I hemmed and hawed (how do you spell this?) about wanting to treat myself to a pedicure, a luxury I hadn't had since my sister was married in September. Why should I pay $30+ to do something I could easily do (and had been doing since September) for myself? Westley insisted I go ... so I relented. It was blissful ... sitting in an electronic massage chair, reading a wonderful book, and being pampered. I even stopped by a coffee shop on the way home to redeem a gift card (Christmas gift from a student) for a beloved chai latte.

A little later that afternoon, Westley announced it was time for our date. He'd hinted that it was "somewhat of a performance" that we were attending, and on the ride there, he confirmed my new suspicion that he was taking me to a movie. He asked if I'd guessed which movie but I honestly admitted that I had no idea what was playing. When I saw the list of titles on the marquis, I knew instantly! He bought us tickets for Jane Eyre because he knows it's my favorite novel. (The movie was hauntingly lovely, although the very end of the book- my favorite part- was not included.) After the movie, we spent a quiet and peaceful evening at home.

Today feels luxurious because the sun is shining (even though April's chill is lingering), the tree outside the window has these beautiful, deep pink buds which are thinking about opening, and because I made time to thoroughly scrub down our bathroom. I'm not the most organized of people, so I feel especially content when I've sorted through my stuff to get rid of items I no longer need and/or after I've cleaned. Normally, cleaning or take care of other chores are the type of activity I tend to put off while procrastinating. Westley loathes ironing, so I agreed to take on that chore when we got married ... and there was a green shirt of his which stayed at the bottom of the ironing pile for months (September through January? February?) because it took me that long to actually get through the [short] pile of items to be ironed. So ... when I've made an effort and the instant rewarding feeling comes flooding through me (Hurray! I've completed something and our place is slightly more organized!), I always wonder why it has taken me so long ... if I derive so much enjoyment from getting something done. (I was going to write something about "instant gratification" from completing a chore, but it's really not so instantaneous if it takes me such a long time to get it done!)

Luxury is getting a pretty pedicure in order to be ready for the lovely Spring weather. (Who cares if it's not yet warm enough? My toes are cute and I'll wear those open-toed kitten heels even if it is still in the 40s outside!)

Luxury is going on a date with my husband (and it's a bonus that the movie was based on my favorite book)!

Luxury is looking over the freshly scrubbed sink, toilet, sink, and mirror and thinking with a smile, "Good. That's finally done and BEAUTIFUL, and I'm hoping it will stay clean over the next 5 days until my in-laws come to visit!"

Luxury is finishing a wonderful novel, mourning its end, and enjoying the lingering grasp it has on your imagination.

Luxury is writing the third blog entry within a short time span after neglecting the blog for nearly a year ... and realizing that returning to writing is like visiting with an old friend. Time may have passed, but you can pick up where you left off and it feels like it's been no time at all.

Minor irritation

One of the things which annoys me is when a child does not turn in an assignment and then claims to his/her parent that they have. I dutifully check all of the potential places a child could have submitted an assignment (even though there is one designated place for each class). Then I respond to the parent stating that I have checked and re-checked (because the first time I check is when I've graded the rest of the class's assignment), and, alas, the assignment was not turned in. I usually have them ask their child to check his/her binder ... because usually that's where the assignment was all along. The parent, of course, does NOT apologize for making me do all the extra work of searching again when they should have asked their child to double-check in the first place.

What really irritates me, however, is when the parent simply assumes that if the child can't find the assignment that I must be lying when I say the child hasn't turned it in. (You know how "the customer is always right?" Sometimes it feels like the sales philosophy is taking over education ... "the student is always right," regardless of my years of experience, my professionalism, my education. I'm not saying I don't make mistakes or I'm never wrong ... but why are some people so quick to believe their [irresponsible] child over me?)

The icing on the cake is when the parents simply assume it's no trouble for me to then go out of my way to make extra photocopies of an assignment due weeks (sometimes months earlier) so that the child can make up the work. Yes, I want the child to be successful. No, I don't want his/her grade to be severely affected by his/her irresponsibility. However, REALLY? Of course there's no gratitude. It's just an expectation that I will do all the extra work to make one child happy. And you know how many of these issues come up within a few days of the grading deadline? More than I'd care to share.

Nearly a year

A year in review ... can't really sum up the past year in one post. I started blogging (elsewhere) in March 2001, and I'm feeling guilty that I basically stopped for one year before I reached a decade!

Anyway, enough whining about stopping ... and here's to a fresh beginning (after revisiting the past for a little) ...

Past year: Reached tenure, did the one-income deal for 8 months as newlyweds until Westley scored an amazing job, played piano often (church choir tour, local camp, district concert), performed in a show for the first time since college (ironically, in the last musical that I had performed in college too), etc. Loving married life. Marrying Westley = best decision I've ever made (unless you want to count going to GradSchool where I met Westley ...) :)

One of the most exciting things for me in this past year is that I'm making a name for myself. In my life, looking back, God always placed amazing opportunities in my path - opportunities that would further strengthen/develop my skills to help me become the person I am today. Myriad opportunities. So many opportunities that I simply decided to "try" for even though I had no real hope that such opportunities would come to fruition for me. Somehow, the majority of the opportunities did work out ... and have become part of my tapestry of experiences woven together.

Then there was a dry spell - also known as - the time period in which I began my first job, survived, and, well, began to excel. This year, people have started to notice. This is exciting! I was asked to co-present at a [semi-local] conference (out of the blue ... I hadn't applied ... I had only 2 years of experience ... How and why did they think of me?). Then my co-presenter and I decided to submit our materials for a [broader regional] conference ... and we've been accepted! We'll be revamping our materials for late this summer ... exciting! I was asked to take on a [semi-local] service opportunity in an administrative role. I had a wonderful time, I learned a great deal ... and there's talk of me taking on a more challenging position next year!

There have been many times where I've felt disheartened (an increase in people who question how I do my job - being vague on purpose here), overworked (with no raise since I was hired), and under-appreciated. (Our society doesn't value teachers as they once did, and the media is fueling the let's-get-those-overpaid-whiny-teachers frenzy which seems to be spreading around the country.) When I get in one of those sad little poor-me mindsets, I have difficulty compartmentalizing; I love what I do. I am what I do because I pour my heart, my energy, my being into what I do. It's not a job; it's my life.

Then I have to remind myself to reflect on the beauty in my life: the smiles and greetings I share with my students, the sweet little surprise gifts (I have a collage of hand-drawn illustrations which cover the large wall space above my desk in my room), and the wonderful moments when the music becomes magic and we're all within the embrace of the song.

Creative adolescents #32476

After learning about Spanish-speaking cultures (foods, exports, inventions, dances, architecture, etc.), students were asked to name the contribution from a Spanish-speaking culture that they believed to be the most important. One child wrote the following (edited for spelling only):

"I think cocoa beans are most important because I love cocoa. Without cocoa, there will be no more chocolate. If there is no more chocolate men will get very angry and start a revolution. It would rain mad cows, destroying the Mission to Mars project, all because of no chocolate. And it's very yummy in my tummy."

Numbers

2 times I've met with a few other singers in the area for a small a cappella group

2.1 months since Westley and I got married

10 snow days this school year

15 days until the school musical

22 days until a major performance

1,000,000 times that I remember that I should write ... and simply can't find/make the time

26 inches & counting

I've been stuck in a winter wonderland since yesterday afternoon. It started snowing earlier than that but thankfully didn't start sticking until after I'd gotten home from school.

And now, with being stuck inside and lots of extra time to get stuff done, I have absolutely no motivation to do anything productive, such as: writing thank you notes for wedding gifts, unpacking from last week's trip, grading, etc. I figure, however, that I probably won't have school until at least Wednesday, if we make it to school this week at all. Apparently more ice/snow is predicted for Tuesday and Wednesday. I might have the whole week off. While it's nice to not have to go in during dangerous conditions, it does cut into the plans Westley and I have been considering for this summer ...

I'm amazed that the snow HAS NOT STOPPED since it began over 24 hours ago. I believe we still have another 7 hours until the weather channel folks have predicted that the snow will stop.

I left a list of other things to blog about in my last entry ... and I'm sure I'll get to that later on ...

Still on the 'Moon, Part I: Wedding Details

So much has changed that I don't even know where to begin.

Many people have asked me, "What's the best part about married life?" My response has been that it's so wonderful to see and spend time with Westley every day. This was possible in the first three months of our relationship before I graduated from GradSchool. Since then, we've lived in separate states; I was at home with my parents and he was at his parent's home (summers), in a college dorm (last year) and then in an apartment while student teaching. Now we have our own home together in our tiny but cozy apartment. I love it!

The wedding went beautifully ... everything turned out well. The weather cooperated. I'd been a little nervous when we were hit with a snowstorm the week before, but the day was mild with lots of sunshine! We even managed to take some pictures outside afterwards (and I joked to my bridesmaids that this showed how much they loved me- that they were willing to stand out in the cold for these pictures)! :)

We got ready in the morning at my parents' home. Mom and my sister (my maid of honor) and I got our hair done by the lady who has cut our hair for the last 15+ years. (My sister and I no longer go to her, however, because she works in a very high-priced salon and we'd rather get a decent but significantly cheaper cut elsewhere.) Bridesmaid #2(Mentor/Friend), my mom and I had our makeup done. I was so pleased with how everything turned out. I wish I could hire those two ladies every day to make me look beautiful. :)

We met the photographer and the florist at the church when we arrived. My florist had been unable to get all of the flowers she and I had agreed upon- the dark red roses that were supposed to surround the calla lilies- and the ivory roses she'd used looked terrible because they were not in good condition (flopping out, torn, old-looking). I saw them and was upset but said it would be fine. BestFriend (Bridesmaid #1), who was in the room with me, knew I was upset and she kept asking what I really thought after the florist had left the room until I told her I really did NOT like what the florist had substituted. BestFriend said she too thought they looked pitiful, and she left to find the florist to ask her to change them. (I had been too chicken and did not want to be labeled as a "Bridezilla" since I am a people-pleaser by nature.) The florist took out the ugly old roses and surrounded my beautiful calla lilies with some dark red berries she'd brought "just in case," and they turned out gorgeous!

Before the ceremony, my bridesmaids and I were sequestered in a tiny Sunday school room. I met with the photographer and she and I chatted about the list of pictures I'd requested. When she saw that I was about to change into my wedding gown, she left for a few minutes and returned later to photograph BestFriend using her crochet hook to hook the buttons on my dress. We had several fun moments taking candid and posed shots. There was an old wooden piano on one side of the room, and I had the nuttiest brainwave: I would sit on top of the piano in my wedding dress for pictures. Everyone laughed when I suggested it, but I'm really looking forward to seeing how those pictures turned out! I was still up there when my sister reminded me that I had to put on my cheap garter I bought when BestFriend, her husband, Westley, and I met up in CoolCity for a brief but amazingly fun visit on our "negative one-year anniversary." :)

My aunt stopped by at one point to see us, and she was wearing a cute striped knit dress. She told us that my octagenarian great aunt had made a comment about how her dress looked like an afghan. :) She was slightly miffed, but my mom, sister and I thought it was amusing!

Suddenly, we were alerted that it was time for us to get into our places! We walked outside to get into the vestibule (I think that's the word?) which leads into the church sanctuary. I had to remain hidden, and I stood behind the pair of closed doors while my bridesmaids fixed my dress behind me and wished me luck. They shooed me back when I went to get in line directly behind them (behind the pair of open doors leading into the sanctuary) so I wouldn't be seen. My dad patted my arm and (I think) murmured some sweet words.

I remember being surprised when the bridesmaids' processional began because it wasn't the piece I was expecting to hear. Westley and I had found a gorgeous Bach chorale on YouTube and I ordered the music from sheetmusicplus in a collection. Westley said he thought it may have been the same melody but a different harmonization. Who knows? It was still lovely.

After my bridesmaids had processed in, two of my guests (college girls from the church) closed the double doors before my entry. Then I heard my music begin, Prelude to Te Deum by Charpentier. The young ladies opened the door, and my dad and I slowly walked into the sanctuary.

It was surreal, standing at the rear of the sanctuary, and glimpsing Westley waiting at the altar for me. I can still picture it now. Our guests began to turn around and stand up and my view of Westley was soon obscured. I kept looking in his direction, not really seeing any of our guests because I just wanted to see my future husband. The path to the altar was brief but it seemed to take place in slow motion. Before I knew it, however, my dad and I were standing up there in front of the pastor and next to Westley and the rest of our wedding party.

The pastor welcomed everyone to the marriage ceremony of Westley and Es-trell-a! Automatically, I corrected his mispronunciation of my first name ("Es-trey-a"). I've known the pastor for years now and while most people at the church call me by my nickname, "Es," I was shocked that he'd forgotten the correct pronunciation of my name. Granted, my name has been mispronounced by most people when they first meet me, so I'm used to it. I flushed a little when I realized I'd blurted out my name correctly, but the people who heard simply chuckled. For the rest of the service, he referred to me only as "Es." :)

Our first part of the ceremony was a hymn, "Now Thank We All Our God." Westley and I had pored over the hymnal trying to find hymns for our ceremony. Our faith and music are very important to us, and we wanted to honor both in our ceremony without being too cheesy about the music. (We met in a choir and are both music teachers, so the cheesiness factor could have been extreme, but we worked hard to keep it elegant!)

After the hymn, the pastor asked who was giving me away. Instead of the traditional "Her mother and I do" response he'd practiced at our rehearsal the previous evening, my dad improvised something else. I don't remember exactly what he said, only that I was surprised that he'd decided to say something else without telling anyone beforehand. :)

The rest of the ceremony continued beautifully. The readings were rendered beautifully (Romans 12:9-12, Song of Songs 2:10-13, and 1 John 4:7,9-19). My step-grandmother read from the Bible she'd carried as a bride when she married my grandfather over 40 years ago, and she told me at the rehearsal the previous evening that she was going to be giving me that Bible after the wedding ceremony. I was struck by the thoughtful and meaningful inclusion of my grandfather's memory in the ceremony.

Westley and I exchanged our vows. We had decided to use the traditional vows printed in the hymnal, and the words were the same for the both of us. The pastor read the words and we echoed them to each other as we gazed into each other's eyes. (I was grateful that Westley said his vows first because that gave me the opportunity to hear the words 3 times before I echoed them back!)

We exchanged rings with ease and said the Lord's Prayer. After the blessing of our marriage, the pastor introduced us as Mr. and Mrs. LastName, but he didn't say, "You may now kiss the bride." After a pause, he murmured to us, "You guys can kiss now." Without thinking, I responded, "Sweet!" before Westley kissed me. I blushed deeply when I realized I'd spoken- for the second time- without thinking. I don't think many people heard me though. :)

We and our guests sang the hymn, "Be Thou My Vision." (This is one of my favorites, and my younger brother and I sang this at my grandparents' church on the weekend of my grandfather's 90th birthday, the last time we saw him before his passing the following Spring.)

Then our recessional music began. This time, I was able to actually see our guests (unlike my processional), and I remember seeing our college choral director (my GradSchool mentor and the person who had introduced Westley and me), my good friend from middle school (also a music teacher, but he aspires to be on Broadway someday), and one of my students with her mother. Everyone else was a blur.

After the ceremony, we waited a few moments for the sanctuary to clear before we returned to take some pictures. In spite of the cold outside (40 degrees?), we also took some pictures right outside of the church's front doors on the brick stairs. I can't wait to see how these turned out!

Now this entry has reached such a length that I'll have to post about the following in future posts:
*Reception
*Honeymoon
*School musical
*The Met & NYC
*Caribbean vacation
*Snow days!